Series: Fears of the Spleen #7 – Gate 28 “Fear of Purpose; Fear of Death” 

by Evelyn Levenson

This series explains the energy of each gate around the Spleen Center (these are known as the Fear Gates) so you can learn to master your fears and become unstoppable—in ways that are correct for YOU. For each gate, we’ll cover the circuitry of the gate, its gifts and challenges, its “fear,” and practical ways to apply this information. The Introduction to this series and links to all of these posts can be found here.


Every gate energy belongs to particular circuitry within the chart, which is like an electrical circuit board. This circuitry shows the evolutionary role of the gate energy and how the energy moves through the chart. Each Circuit Group has two Circuits within it.

Circuitry of this Gate

Circuit Group: Individual
The Individual Circuit Group serves the world by bringing forth uniquely individual change (mutation) which indirectly empowers others to transform. It is personal energy, here to follow its own direction and not fit in with others.

Circuit: Knowing
The Knowing Circuit energies are agents of the creative process that drives human growth and evolution. These energies understand the world by simply “knowing,” not based on logic or experience.

High Expression of this Gate

Called the energy for struggle, this gate calls people to feel more alive and to strive to find meaning and purpose. It’s also called the energy of the Game Player.

The highest application of this energy is to seek (and find) what gives meaning and purpose to your life. This connects you to what is worth living for, even what is worth dying for.

If you have this game player energy defined in your chart, you may enjoy living life on the edge, using the spontaneity of the Spleen Center to experience the thrill of being alive.

Your “correct” struggles (entered according to your Strategy and Authority) will lead you to discovering value and meaning in life. When you find what gives your life meaning and you live from a grounded sense of purpose, the everyday struggles you may have experienced previously will tend to fall away.

It’s possible for you to embrace the struggle and enjoy the challenges you encounter, knowing they lead to deeper meaning and purpose, and knowing how good it feels to triumph over the struggle!

Playing the game (of life) well has its own rewards!

Low Expression of this Gate

For those experiencing the low expression of this energy, life can feel like a fight or a struggle with no redeeming value or point. If you have this energy defined, you may often do things the hard way even though there was an easier way available. Things that are too easy may seem to have less “value” for you.  For example, you may hold the belief that:  if it’s worth having, then it’s worth struggling for, and if it doesn’t involve struggle, then it’s not worth having.

Expressing the low version of this energy may lead you to take big risks in order to feel alive and live life to the fullest. You may rebel against the status quo, or you may struggle with depression, despair, and even suicidal thoughts. Efforts to numb this much emotional pain sometimes lead to addictions of all kinds, or substance abuse.

The “Fear” of this Gate

All Splenic Fears are in-the-moment fears that feel so real they can stop us in our tracks and keep us from moving forward. But we are meant to simply push through them because they are not truly survival-related fears. They quickly dissipate when moved through, often never to return again (though it may take a few times of “doing” your fear to banish it permanently). Focus on using the high expressions of this gate to help you get past the fear.

The potential fears of the Gate 28:

-Fear of Purpose – “I don’t know why I’m here.” “I’m afraid I can’t/won’t find or fulfill my purpose.”

-Fear of Death – “I don’t want to die before I’ve found what makes life worth living.”

-Fear that Life is Empty and Meaningless – “There is no meaning or purpose, so why bother being alive.”

Tips for Using this Energy

This gate is activated by the sun from approximately October 26 through October 31 each year, though this can vary by a day or two. While the sun is transiting Gate 28, this energy can bring up questions of what we’re committed to in our lives and what our true purpose and intentions are. You may notice more fights and struggles in your local world and on the global scene as well.

This can also be a time for getting deeply in touch with and appreciating what brings meaning and purpose to your life.

If you have not found or are not living your purpose yet, you may experience fear around whether you’ll ever find it. Or, if you do find it, whether you are up to the challenge of fulfilling it.

There may be a heightened level of pleasure seeking (for escape) and/or deeper despair.

Any time of year, use these tips to help you:

-As with all splenic fears, it is just energy and it soon shall pass.

-Take time to evaluate what holds meaning in your life and, perhaps, what you could let go of that no longer serves you (especially if your Spleen Center is undefined).

-If fears around finding or fulfilling your purpose have been holding you back, use your Strategy and Authority to get in touch with what resonates with you and lights you up. You are probably already living your purpose, you’re just not consciously aware of it. (A professional Human Design Reading can help tremendously with this.)

-If life just feels like one struggle after another, stop. Breathe. You may wish to step back and take the 30,000 foot view of your life and your direction, and see how all of your “challenges” have shaped your experience and your wisdom.

-You and those around you may benefit from your sharing about your struggles, but only if they are asking and eager to hear what you have to say. (This is projected energy, so it needs the right timing to be shared.) Remember to teach from your scars, not your wounds. If the pain is too fresh, you might not be ready to share productively about it.


Last gate in this series: Gate 44 – Fear of Repeating the Past

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    1. The placement of your Gate 28 activations means that your spiritual path needs to fill you with a sense of meaning and purpose. If it’s not doing that, keep looking.

  1. I have D28.2(SN), D28.6(Pluto) & P28.4(Pluto). My whole life feels like a giant struggle for elusive meaning and purpose, with a CONSTANT fear that I’ll die before I figure it out! Nothing would frustrate me more.

    1. With the Gate 28, it’s so easy to get focused on the difficulty and the struggle that’s in front of you. It may help to reflect on whether there is deeper meaning or lessons in the struggle. Is there something you have learned that can help someone else?  Frequently, I find that people are often “doing” their purpose, whether they’re aware of it or not. If you’d like to explore the issue of life purpose, I offer 2 specialty readings that specifically address life purpose: the Soul Purpose Alignment Reading ( ) and the Life Path-Soul Mission Reading ( ).

    2. The trick with the Gate 28 is to let it inspire you to seek and find meaning and purpose, without making you crazy along the way. I know, easier said than done. You are probably doing much of your purpose already, without fully realizing it. Sometimes it’s right in front of us, though we don’t allow ourselves to see it. In nearly all of my readings, clients are already living their purpose–it’s like we can’t help but BE who we are and DO what we’re designed for. The confirmation helps them to see it with new clarity and relax into it. I hope that helps!

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